Archive for the ‘Urban the Liar’ Category

Link-O-Rama… Because I’m Sitting here

February 6, 2009

A small, but needed, Link-O-Rama for all of you to consume. Please chew carefully.

Why The Hell Not?… The Final Act

August 28, 2008

Welcome to the fifth and final installment of this overly optimistic prediction series. Please enjoy!

Like a crazy Wookie army, the Fighting Irish are invading the BCS for a third time in 4 years. This is how the BCS shook down in 2008.

        • BCS Championship #1 Ohio State VS. #2 Georgia
        • Orange Bowl #7 Clemson VS. #6 Missouri
        • Rose Bowl #9 USC VS. #11 Michigan St.
        • Fiesta Bowl #4 Oklahoma VS. #5 BYU
        • Sugar Bowl #3 Notre Dame VS. #8 Florida

        Notre Dame (11-1) VS. Florida (10-2)

        The Irish march once again into New Orleans to play in the Sugar Bowl against an SEC foe. This time it is a rematch of the 1992 Sugar Bowl against the Florida Gators.

        Oh my oh my. As one could probably imagine, the Gator football team and the party city of N.O. did not mix well. There were reports all week of Gator players getting into a lot of shit, but nothing really surfaced until the night before the game.

        Ronnie Wilson of AK-47 fame, took a midnight stroll around the city. He figured since he was out and about, that he might as well sell some crack that he got from Tim Tebow. This was some good shit as Tebow used his missionary status to smuggle it in from the source. Once Ronnie got his stash all sold for the night he took a personal hit for himself and whipped out his latest weapon of choice… another AK-47. No one was hurt, but he did manage to hold the entire French Quarter in terror for about an hour while he shot up every street sign he could find. He was finally detained when a late night nutria hunter knocked his ass out with a string of dead nutrias and New Orleans police arrived and took Ronnie into custody. No one got a good look at the Good Samaritan, but some bystanders described him as a wild-eyed older gentleman that just seemed “bat-shit” crazy. When questioned about the event, Florida coach Urban Meyer dazzled the media by proving he could tap his head and rub his tummy. Chris Fowler was overheard saying, “This man is a saint. I will follow him.”

        On to the game.

        Compared to the night before, the game seemed to take on a calm undertone as both teams warmed up and stretched. Tim Tebow was dressed and ready despite the accusations of drug running that came after the Wilson incident. Then, as if it was straight out of the movie Braveheart, Jon Tenuta comes running out of the tunnel wearing a kilt and an enormous cape made of nutria fur. He runs over to the Florida side of the field and begins chanting an insane mix of gibberish, Latin, and profanities not seen since George Carlin. Tenuta was the hero of the French Quarter.

        The game itself turned into a defensive battle. Tim Tebow was somehow ineffective running his coaches PAL offensive system. Corwin Brown was smart enough to show game film from about 30 different PAL games in Indianapolis to show his defensive players what they were up against. Quarterback run left, middle, right and sometime a long pass. The Irish weren’t moving the ball much either due to the stout Gator run defense with a couple of big DT’s in Omar Hunter and Justin Trattou. When ND tried to pass, they were just a little off target and out of sync. The game was tied at 0-0 at the half.

        Right away in the third quarter things started to change dramatically as the Irish started to string together a long drive by running the ball right down the throat of the Gator defense. It wasn’t until James Aldridge scored on a 22 yard TD run that the public was aware of what was happening. Urban Meyer was carried off by a cult of media followers that canonized him at half-time. Chris Fowler, Mark May, and John Saunders formed as the leaders of this crazy rabble of worshipers. But because Urban wasn’t there, a slew of players followed him during this ritual. Players such as Omar Hunter, Justin Trattou, Percy Harvin, and others walked calmly next to him. It was later discovered that all of the players involved in this “walk-out” were under a trance similar to that of the CIA’s MK-Ultra and that was how they originally were recruited by Meyer. What a fucking game.

        Oh yea, the IRISH won 42-0.

        MVP- Chris Fowler for dedicating his life to Meyer and taking him and his mind-controlled players with him to a compound somewhere outside of Boulder, Colorado.

        The Irish finished 2nd in the polls behind Ohio State. Just wait until 2009!

        Editors note: I am completely bat-shit crazy (man I love that word today) myself and believe this latest post should be the proof needed to lock me away in a state mental ward. Hi mom!

        Beer Olympics VS. AK-47

        August 4, 2008

        You will, no doubt, see the following pics on a lot of different blogs and websites soon enough as they have already surfaced at The Big Lead. Good for them. Somehow they manged to survive a 3-9 season, stay in good standing academically, and party like a rock star (even if it might be a rock star from an 80’s pop band). I’m positive that I see no AK-47’s being shot in the air in the background or a stacks of mad cash.

        OR…


        Save the holier than thou speech for your wives, kids, and parents.

        ROTFLMAO

        April 24, 2008

        At his press conference today to announce his decision to play for Georgia, QB Aaron Murray cried out “I’m just so fucking happy that I’m not going to play for that douche Urban Meyer. Fuck that guy!”

        Douche Bag Alert

        March 31, 2008

        Urban The Liar at his finest…

        Douche Tats

        January 28, 2008

        After reading this article on how Nebraska kept 4 star linebacker, Will Compton, Urban The Liar ran out to a tattoo parlor at 3:30 in the morning and had his entire wish list of recruits for 2009 tattooed on his back.

        This is the look he gave when he heard the Compton tat was… temporary.

        True.

        You Tube Rocks

        January 10, 2008

        I found this on NDNation.com and had to post it and share for everyone that hates Florida. And if you read this blog, I’m sure you hate Florida and that douche fuck Urban Meyer.

        O’ Mar Gawd

        December 20, 2007

        .

        .

        A lot of Internet chatter has been going on about Notre Dame’s verbal commit Omar Hunter. If you follow recruiting as closely as I than you know that Omar is perhaps… looking elsewhere. Here is The Subway Domer thoughts on Omar and some half witted insight about the rumors around the web…

        Omar is taking a visit to Florida in January. Yes, it seems as if that weasel Urban Meyer is back at it again with his sidekick Igor… I mean Greg Mattison. (Whose son would rather play for Ferentz and the Hawkeyes). He will visit Gainesville with a teammate on January 11th. If you didn’t know that, you either are perfectly sane or dead. Check your pulse, because things are going to get a little crazy. Here’s what I think…

        • Omar is a GREAT prospect. And this seems like a little Deja Vu is going on considering ND’s past history with recruiting top defensive tackles. But Omar just isn’t any DT. He is the prototypical NT in a 3-4 system.
        • Half-Full if a decommitment is near: We have 3 other DT’s commit for the 2008 class.
        • Half-Empty response to a know it all drunk: 3 on paper. Cwynar might be a DE, Newman is a definite NT, and Hafis Williams… no one knows anything about him. (Which means I have seen no video on Scout or Rivals).
        • The proving it on the field respone: IAN WILLIAMS. He will be a Sophomore next year with already a ton of P.T. and was very productive this year as a freshman.
        • If we keep him great, if not… start looking for one in 2009.
        • That’s it people. This is by no means over, and Weis is just handing Omar over to the Satanic Cult that is Gator Country, but you should of learned your lesson after last year. Kids change their mind all of the time. Bummer.

        Bizarro And Commitment #13

        May 27, 2007


        Brandon Newman is Irish. The 6’1″ 305 pound nose tackle informed Coach Weis this weekend that he was coming to ND in 2008. This was during a scheduled visit to ND and a sleepover at Braxton Cave’s home. Captain Caveman has been as involved in recruiting other top talent as the Irish staff.

        The Pleasure Ridge Park High (Louisville, Kentucky) standout chose ND over a host of other schools, including in-state rivals Louisville and Kentucky. There is no doubt he will be receiving even more offers now that he has committed to Notre Dame.

        What makes this a truly extraordinary commit, besides being a top talent, is the fact that this is the 3rd DT committed to the Irish. O.K., the other two project more as defensive ends, but none the less this is HUGE for ND which has struggled in the past to attract top talent on the d-line, despite offering early playing time.

        What world are we living in? Is this Bizarro World. Things are changing for the Irish and the hiring of Corwin Brown seems to be the catalyst. Of the 13 commits, 6 of them are on the defensive side of the ball. This is a long ways away from Ty’s days of losing out on these guys, and not filling out the depth chart. Another bizarre point; Our 13th commit last year was Taylor Dever…on December 16th. Next someone will be telling me that at the end of the season, ND will have a top 10 defense and, despite their youth and a EXCRUCIATINGLY tough schedule, the Fighting Irsh will make back to a BCS game… and win. I think I might like this world, which is looking like the glory days of old.

        I need a Beer. I’m Irish.
        Welcome To ND Brandon!!!

        Ohio/Florida: Agony of Defeat

        January 11, 2007

        youtube.com is blowing balls and keeps removing my vids. I am sorry for any inconvenience

        This is not a celebration of Florida. This is a bitchslap to OSU. Screw Urban da Liar and his band of illiterate men. I hope he sent a hooker to Zook for the players he got to start out with.